Worse than a snit

What’s worse than being in a snit? Being livid.

I found out this morning that the MIL would not be going home but would be going to a rehab facility instead. Of course, I already knew this but she is in denial and so is my husband so I just went along them when they said she would be going home.

Anyway, it is the hospital staff I’m so angry with. I told the discharge person/social worker yesterday what our first choice of a rehab home was. She told me that was the hardest one to get into. I told her I understood but to please try her very best and she said she would.

I spoke to the social worker again today and re-emphasized which home the MIL wanted to go to. The social worker said, oh, sorry, the facility does not have a bed, we will have to go with her second or third choice, whoever has a bed. Hello??? Maybe that’s they way they treat people that don’t have anyone to go to bat for them but that’s not the way they treat MY family member. I asked the social worker if she thought it would do any good for me to call the home myself and ask. She said she didn’t know if it would help but it couldn’t hurt.

So I called our first choice and they didn’t even blink an eye. I guess telling them that “I’m begging for a bed” may have helped, but I don’t know if that was it or not. They just said that they needed clinical papers (or whatever the term was) faxed over and they would see if they they would be able to help.

I called the hospital social worker and gave her the direct number to the rehab home’s admissions office. I asked her to please let me know if our first choice would be able to take her. That was at 1pm. So I waited until 3:30 without hearing from anyone. I called the home’s admissions person again and they said, oh, yes, we have a bed and gave me the room number. She said it was all set up. The social worker had said she would call me when she knew for sure but she didn’t.

So that was one thing that made me mad. The other thing was that the social worker tried to pass the buck. She said she had faxed the request to our first choice yesterday and got an immediate “no beds” response. I think she should have called them herself and talked with them instead of shrugging it off and calling, er, faxing around to other places. I guess that’s why it is good my MIL has me to go to bat for her. I might not be good for much but I’m good for that much.

The other thing that has me livid today is the hospital nurse. The hospital is 15 miles north of me and the rehab is 15 miles south of me. Last time the MIL went to rehab I went to the hospital and followed the ambulance to the home. The hell hole, er, home was in the same town the previous time though. This time I decided to wait until they transported my MIL and then meet her at the home. The social worker assured me that I would be called whenever the hospital arranged for transport so I could drive to the rehab home and meet my MIL there. So I waited. And waited. Finally I called the hospital and they said, oh, yes, we called for transport about an hour ago and we were given a tentative time frame of 2 hours.

Now as I’m typing this I don’t know just why I became so livid but I was just fit to be tied because I wasn’t called as they said I would be. Deep breath. There really is no harm done - it isn’t like she was taken to the rehab facility already. She is still at the hospital waiting for transport. The nurse now says she will call me when the ambulance gets to the hospital to transport the MIL to the rehab joint. Let’s just see if that happens. The Old Lady said she would call me when the ambulance got there to transport her but sometimes she gets disoriented and I didn’t want to depend on that. I will say she has been strangely coherent today. She sounded just like she did when I met her about 11 years ago, before she had all the medical problems she has today.

It is 6pm now and I haven’t gotten the word yet, so this looks like it is going to be another long night. I’m holding up just fine - I really have a very easy life. I just hope my husband doesn’t have a nervous breakdown from all the stress and long days he has been putting in lately.

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